"No, Jane, I have already told you we shan't be having any jocularity or festive gambols this Christmastime!" Eliza said sharply. "We shall all sit here in the parlor whilst I play Daphnis et Chloe on the spinet."
Jane almost fell off of the uncomfortable rattan chair she was perched on. "What, in the dark?!" she exclaimed.
"Yes, Jane, just like last year."
"But Mummy, James must return to Swillbilge Hall before it snows harder outside. He should be with his family tonight, not here."
"Your lustless paramour shall remain with us here until tomorrow evening at the most," Eliza replied gently but firmly. "Tonight he shall sleep in your room, and there you both may do as you please to celebrate the Day, whatever it may be."
Jane stamped her little foot. "But Mummy!" she cried plaintively.
"Do you need to be disciplined, young lady? Hmm?"
In the gloom Jane pouted. "No, Mummy," she whispered.
"Good, then commence acting like the customarily graceful woman that you are and accept the situation like a mature adult!"
"Yes, Mummy. Um, may I go upstairs with James, please? I don't much care for Ravel tonight."
"Yes, Jane, you may."
"Thank you. Come along, James."
And as Eliza resumed playing the spinet Jane led James up the broad staircase, illuminating the way with a small candle the size of a man's unerect penis.
"I'm dreadfully sorry about this, James, but I'm afraid Mummy can't be defied in matters such as this."
James smiled warmly at her and took her hand. "It's quite all right, my dear. But why are we going upstairs now? It's only half past five o'clock."
Jane laughed and said, "Well, it is almost my bath time, you see, and I shall require your assistance in laving those places I can't quite reach by myself."
James halted abruptly on the stairs and released Jane's hand.
"What? Are you serious, Jane?" he asked incredulously. "We've only just supped."
She smiled without any indication of slyness or flirtation. "Quite serious, darling."
James paused to consider this, then nervously cleared his throat and said, "You know, Jane, perhaps I ought to try and make my way back to Swillbilge after all. Yes, I think I should go back downstairs and discuss my departure with your mother." But as he turned to go Jane caught him firmly by the arm.
"Are you mad, James?! You can't go home now! It's still snowing rather fiercely outside! Besides once Mummy starts playing that damned ballet she won't heed anything but the music. No, it's best you remain here. Tonight. With me." She gazed pleadingly up at him with irresistible blue eyes that shone brightly in the soft glow of the candlelight, took his hand in hers and pressed it firmly, never once looking away from his handsome visage.
James pursed his lips in thought, then sighed. "Well..."
"Please, James!" Jane whispered fiercely, squeezing his hand a bit tighter.
"Well (ouch!), all right, Jane, I'll stay."
Jane muffled a tiny squeak of delight.
"Yes, I will stay, my dear...but on one condition."
"Oh? What's that, James?"
He grinned and stooped to peck her parted lips. "We. Bathe. Together!!" he whispered passionately in her ear.
Downstairs Eliza plainly heard her daughter's breathless giggling and a terrible rumbling of footsteps that ceased with the blast of Jane's bedroom door slamming shut. She tsked and furrowed her brow yet soldiered on with her blessed Purcell, only now she gave it all the feeling and gusto that one would've for a Christmas carol.
DB/c1997, 2015
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