Pyssinges and Shyttinges (Pissings and Shittings)

Today, I desire
a roistering, laughing,
ruddy, farting,
jumping, hopping, bouncing,
pissing, bussing,
sweetly stinking,
beautiful, smart,
Rubenesque (aye!)
Irish whore.

(Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, no!)
I've done it again! Quick, quick,
run through the streets
w/ blood in your eyes (WHY AM I -)
bang an industrial waste drum
w/ your broken arm    (WRITING THIS?!?)
and scream "HE'S DONE IT AGAIN!!
HE'S DONE IT AGAIN!! SINNER!!
MEDIOCRITY! MEDIOCRITY!
HE'S DONE IT AGAIN! SALIERI!!
MEDIOCRITY!")

                                    (Why not?)


Aye,
an Irish whore...
so I can tickle her wet broken hymen
with my snake's white tongue.

Aye,
a tricksy WHOAman
who will dump her chamber pot
over King William III
if he ever passes under her window
O how she would yearn for that day!
(She might even want to bugger Queen Mary -)
ERIN GO BRAGH!!!
(- but that's something quite, quite different!)

MEDIOCRITY!!
HIER MEDIOCRITY!!!

I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING!!
YOU'RE thinking
why an Irish whore,
and not a good ol' hearty English whore?!!
(or Scotch or Welsh?)

Simple:
'Cause Ireland was what first came
to my mind,
that's all.
OKAY?!! YA HAPPY NOW?!!

Aye,
a sweating, smiling WHOAman
who will bathe in the Liffey,
the Shannon, the Boyne,
all of Ireland's noble rivers
eventually,
and swim and float around in them
like a nomadic naiad,
happy being free and naked
and magical and giddy and alive,
away from routine
and mediocrity
and me(n).

She'll swim far and away,
maybe even go
as far as...

Nah,
she'd come back
after a while
(I'd wish her back)
and lie in my warm embrace
(rivers are cold and heartless bastards, really)
and consider loving me
perhaps a little bit,
then later she'll think
as she quietly fills
her little chamber pot
of buggering Princess Anne

PHENOMENAL WHOAman!!

I was thinking of mentioning
that sometimes, at night
just to show her really rebellious side,
she would tie the Union Jack
around her copious waist
and run topless through the village, swifter than Atalanta,
while screaming "ERIN GO BRAGH!!
ERIN GO BRAGH, COMRADES!!!"
but...oh, wait, I just did.

My wild, wonderful
Irish whore
who puts all others
to shame,
and whom I'll never know
carnally

or at all.





VIRGINS GO BRAGH!!!!!



DB/2.22.2000,2019